no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
