Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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