I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
