Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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