I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
This is my gift to your gina
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
