benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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