so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
