You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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