Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize