I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
