There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
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