I wish they made helmets for livers.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
