Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
