Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
