Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Sober January is a disaster.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize