oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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