Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
