Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
he thought i was a dude.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
