Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
