and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
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This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
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I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.