My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize