I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
