I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
