Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
