I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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