Define "chronic" masturbator.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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