you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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