I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
