i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
