Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize