Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
