there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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