big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
