i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
