i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Randomize
