If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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