Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
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He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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