I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
