Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
