He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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