I accidentally burped into my bong.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
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