Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
