is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I forget how to act sober
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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