I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
