you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Randomize