Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
