Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Randomize
