so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
