I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
PANTIES FOUND
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