I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
