I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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