I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
